confessions? venting moment

i saw a sister write one of these on tumblr so i decided to make one.. but i can't post it there cuz 2 of them its like deep?


1] i really wish you could see how much this is really bugging know.. i know it sounds so selfish but dang yo, i've liked him since last year and you come outta nowhere... KNOWING that i like him... you start liking him. it kinda hurts ya know? it feels likes you just like stole him from me.. but i know i said its okay.. cuz i mean he likes you back anyways.. and plus i know you mean well.. and i know you don't/ didn't mean it to be like this.. but i dunno.. but really, i was hoping you would see that it isn't :( and its stupid of me to be like being all like worried or mad or w/e about this cuz its JUST a guy.. SISTERS > BROS BUT, i really do thank you for saying that our friendship is more important than a guy. <3 i love youu no joke

2] sometimes i wish i moved to SA and went to UIW for college.. cuz i know everything would be different.. i would be different.. i probably would be who knows where.. but i'm glad i stayed.. cuz i'm closer to my best friend. <3

3] i feel so old in the community now.. its like everything i do.. i have to make sure its okay and approiriate.. i mean not that i would do something stupid and horrible and w/e but its just i'm not use to people looking up to you.. i just wanna go back to where i was still a noob.. ahhh.. maybe i should consider moving up soon.. ya know actually going to Campus Based.. but i still have my Household position here..

4] i'm really thankful for my family.. really, i am. i might not show it as much as i should but im just not into that lovely dovey show how you feel about your family.. but sometimes.. they annoy me.. to the point i wanna move out.. cuz really it annoys me how my mom gets mad at me for stupid things and like allows my sister to do whatever she wants.. *sigh i miss my kuya being at home.. cuz he would take me out and junk :( ugh, i'd rather be away and miss them then be at home..close to them and not like them.

5] i wish i had my faith like i did after camps and/or conference.. i feel so like distant and distracted. i need to get back to refocus and re-prioritize myself.. i dont like this at all.

6] i like you. i need to stop.. but its like i have this hold on you cuz of last year.. you know so much deep secrets about me that i like never told anyone.. and stuff happened.. can you make this go away? maybe i should not talk to you :] kay sounds good.