so tell me...

why does everything seems so hard and like stressful right now? =(

man, my birthday is coming up and my mom's been bugging me about it. tell you the truth.. i really don't know what to do for my birthday.. so she said that i can pick 20 close friends and we can go eat out and all that.. but ughh... 20... thats so hard. i don't wanna leave someone out or w/e and ughh i wanna combine like school and youth.. but thats gunna be kinda awkward. )= and guilla doesnt wanna go with my my youth cuz she says its gunna be awkward.. ugh. well its better than having it with school but RAWRRR. its just so complicated cuz i really don't wanna do anything for my bday.. if anything, i want someone else to plan it and to just surprise me on what we are gunna do... [sigh] i wish i was ballin so i can just have different parties and it would be better. -.-

i wish other states weren't so far so then i can just ask them to come and celebrate my birthday with me :(

im stressing over my birthday and college.. and soon it will be prom and graduation.

someone help me plan.. or plan for me. )=